sick heartbeats

I mourn,

I mourn those that grieve, and have to cease down, 

Those people that stop their heartbeats, I mourn the pause between them, now I pause between the heartbeats that say “I love you, but not you”, 

I pause between those words 

I mourn the feeling of a part of my heart

I mourn heartbeats that cannot say “I love myself, again”,

I pause the fact that there's no God,

no God in any shop shelf, no God to fight for for rights and being.

And now I mourn me

I mourn the black which was your favourite non-colour of all times

I mourn the tears, I mourn God, for letting me in this unfavorable hell, of heartbeats

I mourn what I become with games of heartbeats.